Reality check

I had this idea.
A bucket list.
30 by 30?
Seems like a fun idea to me!

Day 1.
Made great choices all day.
No soda, healthy salad for dinner.
Kickboxing class for the first time.
Ever.
I was athletic.
How hard can it be?

Tour begins.
People stroll in.
Shoes come off.
We patiently wait for the advanced class to end.
I nervously look around to see who else is ready to look like a fool.
Oh good, I'm not alone.

Instructor: Ok let's warm up.
My head: Perfect, I could use a little stretch...
Instructor: Start running around the gym.
My head: EXCUSE ME? YOU WANT ME TO DO WHAT?!?!?
Do you know how long it's been since this ass moved for anything more than another handful of chips?
Crap.
What have I gotten myself into?

Side steps.
Weaving in and out of the bags.
Trying not to play bumper bellies as we dodge each other.
Narrowly avoiding disaster.
Leg lifts.
1 armed side pushups.
This is just the warm up?
Crap.
I'm gonna die.

JRae, meet bag.
Bag, meet JRae.
Sparring commences.
Instructor: You have nice form.
You're not exactly petite, am I right?
Me: I most certainly am not!
Instructor: Well you don't carry yourself like a bigger person.
Me: Um. Thanks.
I think?

Grabbed a spot in the back.
Ledge keeps me upright at times.
Haven't relied upon something that much since I was in the wheelchair.
Wheelchair.
How could I forget?
That's why I'm doing this.

Reality check.
This is gonna suck.
I'm going to hurt.
I let myself get to this point.
Question is: how do I get myself out?

1 jab at a time.
1 less soda.
1 healthy choice at a time.
1 less sweet treat.
1 step at a time.

Reality check.
Bob.
Gulp.
This was supposed to be a walk in the park compared to The Ranch.
2 minutes in and I am sweating like a cold drink on a hot summer day.
What am I getting myself into?

Don't know...but I sure want to find out.

Bring.
It.
On.

30 by 30

Bring it on 30. With 6 months until my 30th birthday, I thought it was time to debut my "30 by 30" challenge. I've been toying with and working on this idea for months now, so it's time to put it out there for accountability's sake! I'm hoping to update with new blogs as I make progress so I hope you'll join me on this journey! What's on your bucket list?!?

1. See someone new in concert.
2. Walk across the Brooklyn Bridge.
3. Go on a picnic.
4. Make something creative using only the supplies I have on hand. Give as a gift.
5. Spend a day with Grammy and have patience with her.
6. Plan out a week of healthy meals with a new recipe each day.
7. Buy a stranger’s meal, groceries, gas, etc.
8. Give up soda for a week.
9. Go to a movie by myself.
10. Do something I really don't want to do.
11. Hand write a letter to 1 person each month.
12. Go back to school. Get a 4.0.
13. Send a compliment or thank you to someone at work at least once a week.
14. Surprise a friend.
15. Try out for the Biggest Loser and if I don’t make it on, don’t let that stop me from changing my life. Shed 30 pounds (to begin).
16. Go to a Farmer’s Market and make a meal entirely out of what I purchase there.
17. Re-connect with an old friend.
18. Read 1 book each month.
19. Volunteer my time for a charity.
20. Visit Sharon’s grave.
21. Forgive someone. Apologize if I was in the wrong.
22. Make monthly donations to Goodwill in an effort to downsize.
23. Have lunch with 10 new people.
24. Try a one week cleanse.
25. Find a new church.
26. Get my teeth whitened.
27. Go on a date with someone new. Ask him out if I’m feeling brave!
28. Host a tasting party.
29. Get a massage and facial.
30. Don’t run from love or friendship.

Here I go again...

No I don't know where I'm going,
But I know where I've been
Hanging on the promises
In songs of yesterday
An' I've made up my mind
I ain't wasting no more time
Here I go again
Here I go again

Tho' I keep searching for an answer
I never seem to find what I'm looking for
Oh Lord, I pray
You give me strength to carry on
'Cos I know what it means
To walk along the lonely street of dreams

An' here I go again on my own
Walking down the only road I've ever known
Like a drifter I was born to walk alone
An' I've made up my mind
I ain't wasting no more time

I'm just another heart in need of rescue
Waiting on love's sweet charity
An' I'm gonna hold on
For the rest of my days
'Cos I know what it means
To walk along the lonely street of dreams

'An here I go again on my own
Walking down the only road I've ever known
Like a drifter I was born to walk alone
An' I've made up my mind
I ain't wasting no more time

But here I go again
Here I go again
Here I go again

Here I go.